(photo credit: Brittany Misra) What color are you innately drawn to? For me, it’s always been the color pink. In Kindergarten, my preferred crayon or marker colors were Fuchsia and Magenta. A teacher once told me that “blue is better suited for little boys,” as she removed the Hot Pink crayon out of my hand…
I know, I know… it’s been a while. Longer than a while. It’s been months! So much has happened since the last entry. Despite everything, I fully intend to pen and complete the series of letters to myself at age 18. This is more of an explanation as to why I haven’t written in so…
Dear Mathieu, You are nobody’s little boy anymore. This is the only thought you have at this moment as you stand over your Diddy’s lifeless body. Your aunt holds him tight, tears streaming from her brown eyes. You know that whatever soul inhabited his body for 81+ years is no longer present. While you wouldn’t…
Coming home / Finding Peace / Giving / Growing up / Hardships / Letter to Myself / Lost and Found / New Beginnings / Positivity / The Act of Giving / Today is a Good Day / Uncategorized
Dear Mathieu, What an exciting time for you! Here you are, 18, now a high school graduate, preparing to enter Huntingdon College in Montgomery, Alabama. You will major in Theatre and minor in Communications since acting, directing and public speaking are your passions. You will make the decision to move out of your grandfather, Diddy’s,…
Finding Peace / First Love / Giving / Growing up / Hardships / Lost and Found / love / New Beginnings / Peace / Positivity / Uncategorized
It’s hard letting go. Letting go feels an awful lot like giving up. Problem is, no matter how many times you replay a series of events over and over again in your head, it doesn’t change the outcome. It also doesn’t make the outcome any easier. Yet, there’s a sense of closure that you wake…
I have tried over and over again to write something for this blog for weeks. I couldn’t quite find a happy medium with what I was trying to convey. I even drafted a super long entry yesterday that I may just borrow bits and pieces of for this one. It was really an issue of…
As this year comes to an end, I can’t help but reflect on something that happened to me earlier. I was watching what I thought was the first episode of American Horror Story: Coven. When I started watching the second episode, I realized how it felt utterly out of place from where the first one…
I didn’t get much sleep night before last. I spent Sunday hanging out with a friend of mine. Together, we saw a live production of The Golden Girls, had a lovely dinner, watched videos back at my apartment, and SnapChatted with those ridiculous filters which alter your voice and give you animal ears. Before I…
Today, December 1st, is recognized as World AIDS Day. This day has significant meaning to me for many reasons. Those of you who know me shouldn’t be surprised by this, and for those of you who don’t, I’ll tell you why shortly. It is not just a day I remember those infected and affected by…
The hardest thing about being depressed for me is that overwhelming sense of repetition. In feelings, in thoughts, in my mind, a replay of events happens over and over. What truly went wrong? What makes sense? Are my friends bored, sick and tired of hearing the same melancholy story? Should I allow myself to be…
Today is different. Tomorrow will be great. And last night, well, last night I had a “come to Jesus” with myself. I’m over this. I am so over this emotional roller coaster over someone who, quite frankly, doesn’t deserve my love. I realized so much after I finished typing my post last night. I said…
I feel like I can’t go on. I feel such immense pain inside that it renders me useless. I barely eat, I can’t sleep well, and I feel like I’m breaking down anytime I’m alone to think. I get myself out of the apartment, see people, have dinners, but I come home to the same…
I have tried multiple times to sit down and pen something, but when I do, I’m unpleased with the words I’ve written. I try forming different narratives and yet, nothing seems worth posting. What I can say is that my mind is always working on what to say, both for the purposes of my blog…
About Last Night In that quick instant when my eyes shut so fast and I saw every color as a burst of light, I truly believed my life had come to an end. I had fallen to the ground before I knew exactly what happened. I didn’t even have time to think about bracing my…
Yesterday was quite draining. I was on a business trip, and mind you, this was the first one I have been on since N left that required me to fly. I felt like I had PTSD when I went inside of the airport. The last time I saw him in person was obviously at the…
Mathieu Vetere 